Friday night thoughts

The week has felt like a millenium. Feeding the hungry monster has taken all the energy out of me. Why do I continue to give it my best effort, knowing that I'm leaving anyway? Because I want that through-July paycheck that I'm entitled to. If the Administration heard rumors that I was slacking in class, they could probably cut me off immediately. Depends on who you are, I guess. The teacher who was having the affair with the student was allowed to resign rather than be fired, and on top of that, was given two months additional pay. A similar teacher in Garden City who had an affair with a student was on the local news wearing an orange jumpsuit. At our school, however, they were willing to do whatever it took to keep it quiet, which meant a quiet resignation rather than a scandalous public firing.

Liberto has been emailing me job possibilities. In a way, it makes me tired. I'm at work just trying to survive these last few days, exhausted beyond belief, and here comes another link on my blackberry to a job possibility that he has run across. By the time I get home in the afternoon, I'm too tired to fill out long, on-line applications. Maybe the real problem is that I would be too tired to take another job if I were to be so fortunate as to be offered one right away. I need a little break if at all possible.

Yesterday, Liberto told me he happened to run into a local politician he knows at some community event. This man knows the Supt. of Schools in Chatham County. He and Liberto got talking about the teacher lay-offs throughout the state, and Liberto just happened to mention that I was one of them. Although it may be political B.S. in a big way, the man said to Liberto, "Oh, you just give me the word, and I can get your wife a job at the schools in Chatham County." Liberto recounted this conversation with me and asked hopefully, "Should I ask him to help you get something?" And I said emphatically, NO! His face fell. I could tell by his disappointed, even angry expression, that he just doesn't understand---and I don't have the words to make him understand that I just can't do that anymore! It's a matter of self-preservation. But he doesn't get it. He slept only two hours last night. I have the feeling he was tossing and turning and stressing about how his slothful wife will drag us all down. But I promise I will get something, somehow, eventually, but I'm drawing a line in the sand. I'll teach college, I'll write, I'll do SAT's, I'll hire myself out as a temp, I'll work at Belk's, I'll sell all the books I own on ebay, but I will not teach high school.