We spent Sunday night at Mark and Terry's house in Statesboro. I got all the fur therapy I desired, many times over! They've got foster animals as well as their own animals, a total of 15. There were eight two-month-old kittens from different litters in an assortment of colors, all hyper and playful, batting each other and rolling around. They are the recent foster-rescues from the Bulloch County Animal Shelter where Terry volunteers. The kittens stay in a large cage in the screened porch, but are let out when the dogs have been sent to the backyard or into the main house. The grown-up cats, three or four, are mellow and sit quietly around the living room. Another grown-up cat, who was in his final days, preferred to stay by himself in the screened porch. Then there were the four dogs, who were so sweet. They stay outside in the fenced yard, but are brought inside at feeding times or for the night.
I know that M & T were hoping that we'd volunteer to adopt one or two of the foster kittens. M even hinted strongly. But we didn't. I loved the kitties to pieces and had a wonderful time snuggling them, but my heart isn't ready. Right now, I want a break from responsibility for another living thing. I loved Pete and Gus and still cry for them. I gave them my very best. They were loved, walked, taken to the vet's, given medication when needed, bathed, brushed and held. When Gus came home one morning with a jaw swollen to three times its size, we took him immediately to an expensive animal emergency room because it was a Sunday. In the late fall before Pete died, I took him for walks that he wanted to go on and carried him home when he was too weak and slow. Those are just a few of many examples of our commitment to our animals. To us, a pet is an important responsibility until its last breath. Sad as I am about them---I can see their headstones from the window next to me---I am relieved not to be worried right now about where New Kitty is, what he/she is doing, if he/she might slip out the back door and fall into the koi pond, or worse still, climb the fence and disappear forever. Right now, I am not worried about New Kitty climbing into the indoor fish tank and drowning, nor am I worried about New Kitty getting stepped on, or crushed by a closing door. I'm not worried about his/her sniffles, poops, or fleas. What I want is for Gus and Pete to come back! But I don't want any other animals. For awhile.
On Monday night, Terry texted me that the old cat on their porch had to be euthanized that day, and the loss had hit her really hard, more than she'd expected.
Yes, that's another reason why I don't want another animal right now. I hope they understand. Since we didn't feel ready to take any of the kittens home with us, I went to Wal-Mart and bought a bunch of doggie and kitty supplies, to assuage my guilt, no doubt, and drove them out to Statesboro on Thursday. Terry is teaching a summer course, so we met on campus. I gave her the supplies, and we went out for lunch. The GSU campus is barely recognizable! So fancy! The student population is now 20,000.
I've been lazy this summer. I don't feel driven to do anything more than flow through the day. I think of this time as rehabilitation from the last school year, as though I'm recovering in a spa or rest home, where my one and only goal is to restore myself. I've started the paperwork to buy out the first of three years from the Georgia Teacher's Retirement System, so I can begin this school year with 7 years' credit instead of 6. Next May, I'll buy another year and will then have 9. I'll either brave it through one more year if they haven't found a way to fire me by then, or try to take up a career of full-time part-time courses at Savannah State or Armstrong, just for the TRS credit.
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